You need him in your life.

I’m bringing back Michael Bolton. I’m tired of him not getting the credit he deserves. I checked to see if I can get a “Missing you now” ring tone and couldn’t find it. This is bullshit.

You are tired if you don’t have Bolton in your life. I will give you a weeks grace period of unTiredness.

When I have a lady friend come over, three things happen:

1. Put on my elephant thong to set the tone.

2. Put on Missing you now and lip sing to it.

3. She leads me upstairs after thirty seconds.

I’m pretty successful at this yet reluctant to share all my secrets. If you need help Click Here! You’re welcome. If that doesn’t work then I revert back to my Kenny G flute skills and that seals the deal. Bring Michael back. I’m done. -Carl Winslow

That video is a complete farce of real life and the real world.  A hot girl like that would never be wearing overalls working at an old gas station.  Kenny G should be ashamed of himself.  He has lied to me for the last time. -Bruce Wayne.